Have You Tried Spending $6,000 To Change Your Life?


Have you tried the Mediterranean diet and eating steamed mustard greens for dinner and pulling a tarot card every morning when you’re barely awake and praying to Durga? Have you tried Vedic meditation and Kundalini at 4 a.m.?

It’s saving me.

And do you walk in nature and pray to the goddesses? Nettle tea and apple cider vinegar with lemon first thing in the morning has made me lose the pesky 15 pounds.

And it is good for your digestion.

Have you heard of that new sacred sexuality course teaching you to be your own lover?




Ecstatic dancing with cacao rituals and praying to the full moon to release your burdens? How about energy work and the new meditation app?

Just $14.99 a month.

Watch reiki ASMR videos—you’ll wake up a changed person. Buy a 100 pound bag of epsom salts and soak until you feel dizzy and light headed.

So very detoxifying for your emotions and liver!

Sleep with clear quartz under your pillow—nightmares will dissipate after 31 days. And burn your negative thoughts after you write them down in your journal from India. Create a vision board of people living the life you wish was yours. Create boundaries; cut out toxic people.

Only divine love, have you heard of it?

Go into child’s pose and surrender, feel it all drain out of you! Go to your naturopath-herbalist-massage-therapist-angel-reader-tarot-manifesting-queen-vegan-wholistic-personal-trainer-akashic record-enneagram-specialist-creative-advisor and you will be healed.

Life changes to be seen so very soon. Just believe.

Or have you called your friends? Have you even talked to anyone in the last 10 days? Have you gone outside of yourself? Have you asked someone else about themselves?

Have you tried not wanting to die?

It may just change your life.