“Where are you going, don’t leave me alone. How do I follow you, into the unknown?”
When we think of fear, we think of the dark, spiders, screeching-like noises, certain textures. But all of us share a universal fear of uncertainty. When things don’t go according to the plan. When unexpected things interrupt the process. When you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. When you are unable to do anything but wait. When you are unable to guarantee the success of something you have been working on.
The what if’s, the too soon’s, the if only’s.
In 2019, I talked about walking by faith instead of by sight – to let go and let God come through.
For 2020, I pray that after letting God in, you will allow Him to guide you through the unknown.
I pray that you will learn to trust the process, even if you can’t fully comprehend it.
I pray that you will trust that He protects you from things or people who are not meant for you.
I pray that you will understand that if one door closes, another door opens.
I pray that you will learn to wait. Waiting for what is meant to be, waiting on His timing, waiting on His calling to go forth.
I pray that you will slowly let go of the past that remains haunting to you. I pray that you will know that you are more than what has happened to you, you are more than your pursuits, you are more than what people may say about you. You are more than the impossible standards you hold yourself to.
I pray that you will give yourself time. You have your own pace, you are running your own race. Just because you are not doing what someone is already doing at their age, it does not mean that you are any less. Just because you are not there yet, it does not mean that you will never be.
I pray that you will learn to lean on the people in your life. Not necessarily on everyone, but I pray that you will learn to understand that it is okay to ask for help. The people in your life who genuinely care about you will hold it out.
I pray that you will learn to treat yourself with the same love you give to others. That it is okay to have your space and your healthy boundaries. That it is okay to take a step back when everything feels too much. That it is okay to prioritize your well-being sometimes. I pray that you will learn that balance, of giving and receiving love.
I pray that you will truly live in the present. Instead of running through the past and incessantly planning your future, I pray that you will also appreciate the present. The time you spend with your loved ones. The laughter, the tears. The jokes, the serious conversations. The adventures you had on the road. The conversations you have with others. Being able to treat yourself to your favorite food, or basking in the scent of your favorite candle.
We may not know what lies ahead. Even if we do, we don’t get to see that far into the future.
But instead of your mind going around in circles, I pray that you will allow God to guide you through the unknown. Through both the good and the bad, He is there through it all.
“Trust in him at all times, oh people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.” (Psalm 62:8)