Thought.is

You swore you weren’t going to get your hopes up this time.

Navigating through iPhone will be easier than ever before, but only after you get used to iOS 8, which, with any luck, will completely ruin your life like iOS 7 did when it was released.

You’ve paused a conversation with, “Hold on, let me Instagram this really quick.”

When you’re being creepy on some hot person’s Instagram. Small talk leads to accidental double taps.

I remember a time when I’d lose my mind over a fresh package of ballpoint pens from Office Depot. Now, I rely on naps and tea to keep me from turning into Patrick Bateman.

When you need to distance yourself from someone who’s bringing you down.

It’s a tale of a sunscreen SPF overestimation, indolent clouds, and an unexpected face-down ass-up nap in a chaise lounge by the pool. This saga would recount the hours I spent immediately after my sun exposure, during which I increasingly felt crabbier (no pun intended) and crabbier as the full extent of the burn set in.

Be sure to share at least three pictures from different points in the show to really show how proud you are to be an American.