Son, put down those academic rankings and financial aid forms. I’d like to have a serious talk about how you’re approaching what will be the most important decision a young person faces.
Smickler leads off first base. Full count on the batter. Wheatley gets the sign, checks the runner.
Post-The View until pre-Judge Judy is not acceptable working hours.
We appreciate you continuing to dispel rumors that a cure for the common cold was invented in 1952. It was not.
SPC (Slap Prevention Coverage) is the nation’s only health insurer that provides an around-the-clock, certified slap technician to ensure that you make minute-to-minute healthy decisions.
WRITER 3: I thought the general was having sex with his memoirist.
WRITER 1: That was Episode 2. And that was a different general.
Against his parents’ wishes, Mr. Weinworth dropped out of college to start a website, blindtrainjumping.com, in which he posts videos of himself jumping out of planes while blindfolded and landing on moving trains using only the sound of the train as reference.
Eighty-two percent of Pinterest users have already purchased a special holiday sweater to wear on Christmas day.