The woman squirted a warm, blue gel onto my boob, and proceeded to rub one of those x-ray sticks they use to tell pregnant women if they’re having a boy or a girl all around my chest. I did not laugh even though it tickled like crazy. She then lingered around several areas of the boob and took what I believe were photos based on a camera-like clicking sound.
They seem like they’re into you — on even days, most holidays and when the moon is waning — but on the odd, typical and waxing days, they’re nowhere to be found. Elusive. Vague. Slightly mysterious. Generally attractive. You’d say they’re totally leading you on, except that would be admitting they’re doing anything at all.
The Oregon Trail — the cult-classic computer game from our collective youth. Within this pixilated trip from Independence Missouri to that valley with a name no one could say, (Wil-a-mett-ey? Wh-eel-met? Or was it the French Weel-may?) lies the greatest indicator of how a man will function as your mate.
Cliche as it is, there’s something about the whole thrill of the challenge. Weak girls go for jerks because they like attention. Strong girls go for jerks because they like “the “game.
Yes, modern times have made it acceptable and common to handle things the quick and easy way, but for certain people, acceptable and common is not enough. Take one minute out of your life and let your really close friend know you’re happy they were born.
There will come a time when you will be faced with whether or not to send a follow-up email to someone you thought you hit it off with, subsequently emailed and have not hear back from since. Here are your options….
She may have smoked crack, screwed Clive Davis and stayed with Bobby Brown for an insanely long time, but the fact clearly remains: Whitney Houston is our poet laureate.