There was something running through my veins that summer. That same something has been running through my veins my whole life. It’s a concoction that consists of fierce passion, commitment, and determination. A concoction that can be either beautiful, or even deadly if you take too much too fast.
I found out later that in the real world there’s a less badass name for that concoction. I discovered it’s one we’re all born with and capable of making. It’s called ‘excitement’, and you excite me.
When I’m with you, nothing else matters. It’s like anything is possible with you by my side, but your presence alone isn’t enough.
There’s a drive behind your motive to be present and that’s called selflessness. A trait in which you often struggle to let shine through, but, when it does my beloved, it radiates radiantly and seeps into the lives of those around you, and once it’s poured into me and mixed with the boiling excitement that courses through my blood, we become unstoppable and I turn fearless and bold.
Sometimes, my rare new traits that shine with your help when I’m around you, look small to you, or even to those around us…and sometimes, they’re invisible to everyone but me.
You make me do crazy things I never would’ve imagined myself having the courage to do otherwise, like, laughing out loud and doing so often. Gazing up at you through my lashes in a way I thought actresses only did on screen, sometimes it looks like me telling you my deepest darkest secrets at 4 A.M. on a Wednesday night.
When I’m with you, and you’re with me, and we’re in sync together, I see everything we could be. Together and separately. I can see you winning the SuperBowl for your team and me running out to the field to kiss you in front of thousands, millions even.
I see myself winning a Pulitzer Prize for a piece of my writing that you inspired me to write, and I can see us getting ready and looking glamorous together on the red carpet of my film adaptation of one my books.
I can see us painting a nursery and getting more paint on ourselves than the walls.
I for certain see many late nights of us laying on the floor laughing at things that would only make sense to us.
I can see myself on top of you, wrapped seductively in between our sheets and riding you until I can’t take it anymore.
I can see the heated arguments that end in rough make up sex, tears and laughter.
I can see us congratulating ourselves on yet another successful birthday party for one of our own when all the lights are out and all the kids have gone to bed.
I see many days of you watching me read, and one day letting me talk you into reading the Harry Potter books where you constantly will continue to say “I see why you like them so much.”
I can see us creating wild intergalactic stories for our kids at night and bringing them to life.
I see a big yard with roses and fairy lights and enough room for you to teach our kids football.
I see us growing old together and handing our magic concoction over to our grandchildren.
I see us living and fulfilling a long life full of breaking cycles and bad habits, and starting new holiday traditions.
I see us being iconic and infamous.
I see you with me and at the end of the day, that’s all I want, no matter how annoyed I am with you or how many tears I shed.
I want you, and only you, by my side through everything for the rest of my life, and if for some reason we don’t happen like how I’ve pictured it, that’s okay too, because you’ve given me the gift to be able to see that there are more ways than one to create a magical life for myself.
No matter what happens, or where life takes us, you will have always been the final ingredient to spark my excitement and bring me to life, and that alone, my beloved, is everything.