22 Absolute Truths I’ve Learned In 22 Years

1. The mean kids in school just were not happy with themselves. There was nothing wrong with me. I was an easy target and the bullies took advantage. I did have a very unattractive crying face, how could I blame them?

2. “Adulting” is not what it was hyped up to be. Bills, bills, go away. Come again another day.

3. Fast food contains hidden surprises. My hair is brown, why is there a blonde hair sticking out of my pizza slice?

4. There are not enough hours in the day. Wake up, go to work, go to class, and hit the sheets, repeat.

5. Alcohol is not the answer to any of my problems. Right?

6. My past does not define who I am. Mistakes are your way of learning and growing as an individual. Do not shame someone over ancient history.

7. Not everyone will like me and that is okay. Life goes on.

8. Deadlines are not to be taken lightly. I have a sudden urge to throw my laptop into the garbage can whenever I realize it is 11:55 p.m.

9. Friends do not come and go. Real friends stick around through the good and bad times.

10. My best friend will always be my mom. I love you, Rebecca.

11. I am good enough. I will not settle.

12. Perfection does not exist. No one is perfect. Do not be fooled.

13. You do not need to be ashamed of being a “nerd.” Yes, I like homework and I am proud.

14. Relationships cannot be forced.

15. I can make my own doctor’s appointment, it is not that difficult. The lady on the other end of the phone will not bite. Remember that.

16. Happiness starts within. Seeking the approval of others will result in a world full of misery. You have to be happy with yourself first. Eat that double cheeseburger, girl. You are fierce. Wear that vintage sweater. You are rocking it!

17. Not everyone who has a license knows how to drive. They will give a license to just about anyone nowadays. If you do not know the difference of what to do at a green light versus at a red light, do not worry, you will still pass your test with flying colors. Just a bit of advice, avoid four-way stops.

18. Chipotle is overrated. I know I probably hurt a lot of peoples’ feelings. My apologies.

19. Clearance racks are my favorite. Red tags, here I come!

20. A 30-minute drive across town is a vacation for me. I do not have enough gas to drive across the country, so driving up the street will do just fine.

21. The minute direct deposit hits, you are broke. I got paid? I did not even realize it, my balance says $1.53.

22. I am getting old. I think I have found a gray hair.