14 Things That Happen When You Get Drunk Alone On A Friday Night


1. You get to watch Pitch Perfect and not feel bad about quoting every single line, even the lyrics that are completely off.

2. Texting people that you haven’t talked to in ages because, well, you’re just in that state of mind

3. You’re able to eat 14 servings of pretzels and vegan cheese without feeling bad about it…

4. The drunk drowns out your roommate having sex with her ex.

5. The weird awkward knocking on the door will feel less threatening, and more endearing…remember you’re a grad student in a college town, they’re probably just drunk and at the wrong house delivering their pizza hut/jimmy johns/ China One.

6. You may fall asleep, wake back up, and no one will really notice.

7. The people texting you are your favorites, but its mostly because you decided to drunkenly text them randomly in your drunk state.

8. Booty work comes on and you automatically get up off the couch.

9. You feel the need to immediately eat as much boxed mac and cheese as possible.

10. You forget what body lotion is actually used for, as well as the fact that you’re wearing contacts and eventually need to take them out…

11.  You sing Miley in a proud state, yet still say a prayer for her long lost extensions that you would have given your left arm for.

12. You dance like Shakira, when you know that’s completely unacceptable.

13. Shittttt, you just broke your roommates stem-less wine glass.

14. You just bought 3 skirts and an “eco friendly” lunch bag on Amazon.